An Open Letter To My Ex Best Friend

Dear Ex Best Friend,

I get it. We grew up and we grew apart. As we got older, our priorities changed. I got pregnant and started a family, you were focused on advancing your career and schooling. We took different paths and that’s okay. I understand why you chose to focus more on what is important to you. I don’t understand why you couldn’t include me in your life anymore.

I made such an effort to keep in touch with you, ask you how you were doing, checking on you and your family. You called me in the middle of the night crying because your boyfriend was being a jerk again, and I was there for you. I told you that everything was gonna be okay and you deserved better, but supported you when you decided to stick it out with him. I listened to you vent about your family drama. I never judged you when you made stupid decisions and they backfired on you. No. I was there for you every time you needed me.

You were there for me too. You didn’t judge me for wasting years of my life with a man who didn’t deserve me. You called me out on being an idiot when I needed to hear it. You listened to me as I cried over my divorce. You were a part of my family, my kids called you aunt. My parents still ask how you are doing. I told you all my secrets, things that no one else knows about me. I felt safe telling you whatever was on my mind, and then one day you were gone.

I don’t know what I did wrong. I don’t know what I did to upset you, or what made you decide to cut me out of your life. I just want you to know that I forgive you. I lost plenty of friends after I had kids because I wasn’t free to go out anymore and party, but you made the effort to come see me. We spent so many nights talking, laughing, and crying over cheap wine and Netflix. So what happened? We were friends for almost 20 years, and I never thought I would see the day that you cut me out. If I ever did anything to hurt or upset you, I apologize. I never meant to.

Some days I still want to text you and tell you about my day. Some days I want to vent about something that happened. I want to reach out to you one last time, but I know that I shouldn’t. I should respect your decision to not be friends. It just feels so unfair that you couldn’t even tell me that you didn’t want to talk. You ghosted me like I was some annoying guy on Tinder. Some days I get mad thinking about it and it hurts my feelings all over again. I know it’s probably pointless to even try to reach out, you won’t answer me. If we run into each other in the future, I won’t ignore you, be rude to you, or treat you like a stranger. I just want you to know that I hope that you are doing well. I hope that you are happy, and I hope that you make the best of your life.

Sincerely,

Your Ex Best Friend

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